The baby blues

I was browsing through the channels of the television the other night when I came across a foreign variety show that sort of caught my attention. It was about a woman who was jealous of her sister because this woman's husband was giving too much attention to her sibling who lives with them. When the hosts probed further regarding the problem, it was found out that the woman just gave birth. From the interview it looks like she was experiencing postpartum blues or postpartum depression.

What is the difference between the two?

Postpartum blues or what some call "the baby blues" is a mild form of depression. This comes a few days after giving birth and can usually last around two weeks. The symptoms, which may be caused by hormonal changes after pregnancy are anxiety, weeping, sadness, moodiness, irritability, appetite changes. But with enough sleep and rest and once these hormonal changes have leveled out mommy will feel much better.

Since the symptoms are very similar to the baby blues, early detection of postpartum depression can be tricky. The difference is that with postpartum depression, symptoms are more severe. There could be suicidal thoughts or a feeling of inability to care for ones child. The earlier one recognizes these symptoms and accepts this problem the better, so one can get professional help.

I remember the time I gave birth to my eldest child. I have already heard of the term postpartum blues but I never thought that I would get them. I thought that those women who get weepy and clingy after childbirth were brats or just plain weaklings. Oh boy, did that mindset all backfired on me. A few days after giving birth to my first child, I could not understand what was happening to me. One minute I was laughing then the next minute, I was already crying with the slightest provocation. I felt frustrated, anxious and lost, incapable of being a mother. I was a mess.

After about a week of this whirlwind of emotions, my husband jokingly told me that I might be experiencing the "blues" associated with childbirth. That's it! All of a sudden I felt as if a weight was lifted off me. I was suddenly relieved. Right then I knew I was just going through a phase and it would all soon pass. It did not take long for me to shrug off those feelings of anxiety.

It did help a ton though, to have a wonderful husband who was very supportive. He always jumped into that role of being my emotional support through my next two pregnancies especially after giving birth. He was always there whenever I would have these emotional struggles. He would always check on me throughout the day whenever he's in the office. Once he is home, he would stay beside me, read a book or watch TV. He would bring me flowers and bring anything he knows that would cheer me up, even if it were just a bag of peanuts. J

Having a husband who supports and understands how you feel is crucial for a faster recovery when going through that experience.

Oh, and to all the mothers whom I have judged harshly with my thoughts, I humbly ask forgiveness. Long live Motherhood! J

Lunch

Preparing lunch for the family can be both fun and exhausting. Fun because you get to experiment on different kinds of dishes when you get bored with meals you are already used on preparing. Exhausting because when you don't know what to feed them it is tiring to think of meals that everyone would like.

Lunch today is that time. Fun and exhausting!

My helper left for the province for a few days. I am now in charge of the kitchen. I always welcome this but today I went blank on what food to prepare. I went to the ref to see if I can recycle some leftovers. None. Opened the vegetable section, viola! Eggplant! I checked the freezer next, fish. Hmmm. So, what can I do with fish and some eggplant within 45 minutes?

First, the eggplant. I laid the sliced eggplant in an oil-coated baking dish. Coated it with Italian sauce (I was planning to use tomato sauce but all I have is Italian sauce), minced bacon and mozzarella cheese. I was able to do 2 layers of these. I pre-heated the oven at 450 degrees, placed my eggplant dish and baked it for 20 minutes.

The fish? Good old fashioned fried dish. I seasoned it with salt and pepper and some garlic powder and fried it.

Lunch was ready in exactly 45 minutes! 

Oh, I just love it when a plan comes together! :)

The Angel of Music Sang to Me

I have always been an actress. Whether my family, friends or whoever agrees with me or not does not really matter, I still claim to be an Actress!

I love anything about acting. One of our family's favorite activities is to go watch movies on weekends. But last September 14, Friday night, to celebrate the birthdays of my husband and youngest daughter (which falls on the same date), we did something different. We mixed and mingled with the more "refined” sector of our society and allowed ourselves to be sprinkled with a little bit of “culture” and watched a musical play at the Cultural Center of the Philippines, The Phantom of the Opera.

Last year, I watched an international production at the CCP and it was a big disappointment. So, I was a bit hesitant to watch the Phantom production because I might get frustrated again. But I was wrong. I was so glad that I went and watched because I was a witness to a night of inspiration and excellence. That night I fell in love with the stage all over again.

When the first note of the overture struck, it just gripped me and I got lost in the world of what is called Theater. Nothing beats live orchestra. From the start, I was filled with anticipation of what is to come, that when the Phantom appeared I could not help the tears from falling. I was captivated when The Angel of Music sang to me.

Movies will always have a different appeal but theater is special. Live, real time acting is different. You get hooked and you cannot help but feel each character as they share their emotions of love, hate and life right there on stage.

Broadway plays will always be excellent. Watching that night, I felt a little envious and at the same time felt a bit of pain because I know that we Filipinos can also create excellent plays like that. Using our own talents, our own creativeness, our own stories, with excellent production at par with the rest of the world. We can. It is just frustrating most of the time due to the fact that it is sometimes hard to get people to partner with to produce such productions.

But I believe, as my friend said, we will get there...one day.

First sip

My husband and I went on a short weekend escapade a couple of months ago. Destination...Baguio City, specifically, The Manor Hotel at Camp John Hay. Not too near but not that far either. For years, it has been our favorite hiding place if we want to take a respite from the clutter of work and other stuff in Manila. It doesn't matter if it is just for an overnight stay as long as my husband is able to go for a long drive and see the green fields and the still remaining tall trees along the highway of Tarlac and Pangasinan. It detoxifies his mind and helps him think clearly, he says. Plus of course add to that, my valuable presence, what else can he ask for. :-)

I, also have my own "moment" of detoxification, and that is the first sip of freshly brewed coffee in the morning. Nothing beats that sensation of satisfaction as that special form of hot beverage in a cup cleanses away that sluggish feeling of sleepiness of the night before. Replacing it with a boost of energy that sets me in the right gear to start my day.


Actually, at any given time of the day, a hot cup of coffee is always a special treat. Anticipating the aroma of that fresh brew as it releases its antioxidants, gives me a different feeling of exhilaration. A welcome assurance of renewed vigor for the rest of my day. 

Post Valentine

Never am a fan of Valentine's Day so I spend it just like any other day...at work. It's a good thing my husband and I have the same sentiments about it. :-) 


But this year I got a special gift from the "other man" in my life. My son.

It was not much. Just a small bag of chocolates.

I am not fond of chocolates either, but this is special of course. I did taste it and it tastes yum.

Thanks Zack for remembering! 

 Batad Rice Terraces

Batad Rice Terraces

One of Philippines World Heritage

...and the fog comes in...

From beaches to mountains, the beauty of this country knows no end. 

It took me 2 hours of mountain trekking to reach this World Heritage up North. I was with some experienced mountain climbers and they said that for a first timer what I did was no joke. So when we reached the place they gifted me with a shirt that says, "I Survived Batad Rice Terraces".

I never liked mountain climbing or trekking. I did it once in 1995 and I promised myself I would never do it again. I never understood why these people, the mountain climbers, get this kind of high when they go up a mountain. I could not relate…until our Banaue and Batad expedition recently.

Anyway, the hike was not easy, but I took it easy. I did not pressure myself. I bid my time and just enjoyed the view. Walking through the winding path by the mountainside with all the green surroundings, gave me a feeling of calmness. At the same time it saddened me because most of the people that we crossed paths with that time were foreigners. But when we reached our destination, I was in awe. I was speechless at the sight of such beauty. My spirits lifted, and seeing what was before me gave me a sense of pride. Pride that I am a citizen of this country with all of its wealth. 

A friend once said that the beauty of this country are reserved to those who are willing to get dirty and sweat their butts off. Believe me, it’s worth all the sweat, dirt and mud at the end of your journey! A most rewarding experience! J

I LOVE BREAD

I have been wanting to post this recipe but i still needed to ask permission from my friend. 

Last Christmas I received a special gift from a friend who’s a Chef. She knows that I have a special relationship with “bread” so when she gave out her presents I was so sure that I was on top of it when she made that wonderful Raisin and Cashew Braided Ensaimada! I am not fond of raisins but this one made me forget that I was not suppose to like them. Haha! :)

Here’s the recipe… 

http://energychef.blogspot.com/2011/12/kulinarya-cooking-club-december-2011.html

THE STATUE, THE MAN

A dream, an imagination or for real?

I looked at the statue, about a foot-size, it stopped turning its head from left to right to look back at me. A tiny smile on its lips.

I was lying on the bed but sat up with a start and shouted, “Stop!”

As if gliding, it descended from the four-and-a half-foot cabinet it was sitting on and transformed into a man.

Seated on my bed, I continued to cry out, “Stop!”  louder this time but i could feel my throat start to tighten.

Still floating, the statue that is now a man continued to come nearer, looking back at me without any expression on its face but I can feel and see the contempt very evident in his eyes. Without opening his mouth, I could hear him shouting back at me with words I could not understand.

Feeling like being nailed on the bed, I struggled to get up but could not. With both my hands held up high, I forced my voice out and yelled, “Stop!” , making sure that he heard me. 

He continued to approach with his gliding motion and deliberately, also raised his hands and locked them with mine.

With our eyes and hands locked together, we both continued to yell at each other. He, with his incomprehensible words and I...I just kept shouting at him while struggling to pull my hands from his tight grip.

Suddenly, I heard the bathroom door open and saw my husband come out. The man that was a statue, still without any expression on his face, released my hands and calmly backed away, scorn still fills his eyes.

My husband started to shake me to wake me up. I slowly opened my eyes as I saw the man or was it a statue, gradually disappear in the background.

"A dream, a figment of my creative mind or for real?"  ")

little birdie

Oh little birdie,

Peeking from a tree

"Look, look back at me.

I am holding a slingshot

Aiming at thee..."

and he said "HELLO"

AND HE SAID “HELLO”

It has been more than 25 years but I still think about him.

I still can’t believe that after all these years I would see him again, and of all places not in this remote province of Dumaguete.

It has been a habit every time I visit Dumaguete, I would stroll by the Boulevard and take pictures of its ever-changing scenes and sceneries – as if there are changes.

 It was near dusk. I was just going thru my usual routine. Walk along the Boulevard, look, take pictures of the landscape and its people. As I scan the faces of the people thru the viewfinder I suddenly froze. The face I was focusing on and who was looking straight at me was very familiar. I lowered my camera, looked at him when he suddenly smiled.

I smiled back. He stood up and walked towards me. The man has dark curly brown hair with a hint of gray.  His smile was friendly reaching his brown eyes. As I look in his eyes, there was a familiar glint. When he was about five feet away, he said, “Hello.”

I said, “Hi.”

Then he asked, “Tabs?”

My heart skipped a beat. There is only one person who calls me that. “Tisoy?” I asked back pointing a finger at him.

He laughed so hard it brought me back to reality. A laugh so familiar it brought warmth to my heart.